In Which We Ask: Where is Everybody?


Everybody on your street is gone…somewhere. How do you know for sure the Rapture hasn’t happened?
That bastard down the block is missing. No way he’s in heaven.
Couldn’t have happened. I didn’t read about it on Barista.
Macy’s One-Day Sales are still going on. Maybe that’s where everyone is.
Because we’re supposed to hear trumpets when the heavens open, not leaf blowers.
Tom Ridge’s color chart hasn’t gone to white yet.
The governor of New Jersey’s gay ex-lover returned to Israel. Hmmm, maybe that is a sign of end times.

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