What Do We Tell The Children – Processing Election 2016 With Kids

You were up late last night, watching and then slowly realizing, albeit in disbelief, what the outcome of the Presidential Election would be. Now this morning, you have to tell your child news you haven’t yet fully grasped yourself.

All around Baristaville, parents, many with kids off from school, went to the polls yesterday and voted, for the first time, for a woman presidential candidate. Kids were part of the process — going on huses to canvas in swing states, wearing T-shirts and buttons, making posters, helping with bake sales. Those same kids woke up, not to a Christmas morning surprise, but instead to what one kid calls “a nightmare.”

So what do we tell the children?

Offer reassurance. Montclair mom Kristin Wald says kids need to be reassured in definite terms. Last night, she put her worried son to bed, telling him “I believe that Hillary Clinton will be the President-elect tomorrow morning. But even if she’s not, we are still the same people, we still have the same neighbors, and you still have the same school and the same friends tomorrow as today. Those things won’t change. And there are lots of really good people who will make sure that love and justice and kindness are around us and that they spread. And we will work hard for that too, no matter who is President. I promise. I love you.”

Explain resilience. Look to the words of President Obama, who tried to soothe America last night with these words “We’ve been through tough and divisive elections before and we’ve always come out stronger for it. No matter what happens, the sun will rise in the morning.” Talk to your child about difficult situations and the strength of people to overcome them and persevere.

Keep talking. Kids will have questions and will hear discussions at school and with peers that may leave them more confused or anxious. Keeping an open dialogue can help kids to process questions they have in the coming days. Let them know it’s OK to be angry, confused, scared or upset and to express those feelings to you. Letting them know they aren’t alone in feeling that way will help them to get through what will be a difficult time.

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37 COMMENTS

  1. Let them also know that when they’re able to explore issues outside their tony Montclair bubble, they should. Then they’ll see some of the reasons that resulted in President Trump. Let them also know that it’s OK to “lose.” And that despite what they hear, the majority of Trump’s supporters are not knuckle-dragging, backward-ass sexists and racists, as the media likes to portray them.

  2. Tell them that Hillary was a corrupt lying crook and that the Democrats should have chosen a better candidate !!

  3. This article is typical Montclair myopia. How about telling your kids that Hillary loosing is a blessing.

  4. I would start by telling them how important to tell the truth is. Not just as a child, but also as you get older. I would explain to them that at some point in their lives they will have to get a job to pay for their expenses in life. I would explain to them that there is no such thing as a “free lunch” and those who work hard are rewarded.

    I would tell them not to rely on the government for handouts. I would tell them to treat everyone equal and not vote for someone because it would make them the “first” at it, (i.e. a woman, a black man, etc.) and vote for them baed on their merit, integrity and ideas.

    I would explain to them how HiLIARy conspired to rob Bernie Sanders of the chance to get struck down for his socialist ideas. I would explain to them how Barack Hussein Obama failed this country over the course of eight years.

    I would explain to them how we, and our kids, our kids kids, etc. will be paying for Obama’s free spending and his mother-in-laws $160,000/pension for the rest of our lives.

    I would then explain to them that going forward, America will put American’s first. How we will Make America Great Again. I’m getting inspired just thinking about it, and so will they.

  5. And that despite what they hear, the majority of Trump’s supporters are not knuckle-dragging, backward-ass sexists and racists, as the media likes to portray them.

    OOOH, high bar you set there. The majority aren’t!

    As the saying goes, Trump may not be a sexist, racist xenophobe, but sexist racist xenophobes sure do like him!

  6. I would then explain to them that going forward, America will put American’s first. How we will Make America Great Again. I’m getting inspired just thinking about it, and so will they.

    Ignoring the rest of your pablum as either bromides or Facebook-meme level discussion (HiLIARy, hiLARious), I just have one quesetion: Which policies that Donald Trump espouses will “Make America Great Again?” Is it the wall on the Mexican border than even 42% of his own supporters will never get built? Is it the trade war with Mexico (not to mention China) that he will inevitably start by imposing tariffs on Mexican goods? Is it the ban on Muslims entering the country that he last characterized as a “suggestion” and hasn’t mentioned in a month? Is it his suggestion to ‘cancel’ the Iran deal, leaving them free to spin their centrifuges at will? Is it his proposed health care plan, which is to remove “the lines” across states, which has already been tried and failed? Is it his proposal to make healthcare too expensive for ~17 million Americans who currently have it? Is it his stated fantasies about saving coal and bringing back manufacturing to this country, neither of which will ever happen?

    I need to know, which set of policies will “put America first”? Because in addition to his loathsome personality that made the debates off limits to my politically curious children, there is plenty to wonder about what his supporters actually like about his policies, such as they are.

  7. Baristanet, you’ve outdone yourselves!

    To all those suffering Montclair Moms who are making their kids suffer with them (here’s hoping their Dads are not such sniveling fools) I have one very positive suggestion: send them off to College ASAP where they can find their real “Safe Space” from bad news. There No One can offend them with reality! And for only $65K/year!

  8. Sounds like mike 91 needs himself a safe space where he can cope today. Maybe the Yale professor that cancelled the test so the poor little students could cope has some room for you mikey?

  9. Sounds like mike 91 needs himself a safe space where he can cope today.

    Nope! Coping just fine, thank you. But hey, same questions to you that I posed to AustinMilbarg. If the knuckle-draggin’ etc. etc. aspect of Trump doesn’t appeal to you, what does? Try to keep cliches out it.

    Maybe the Yale professor that cancelled the test so the poor little students could cope has some room for you mikey?

    Hmmm. Your comment is confusing. If the Yale prof cancelled the exam, then where is he holding room for me? Is opposition to Trump somehow a qualification to attend Yale? I do love bulldogs! Got anything that isn’t anti-PC nonsense about the real world?

  10. To all those suffering Montclair Moms who are making their kids suffer with them (here’s hoping their Dads are not such sniveling fools) I have one very positive suggestion: send them off to College ASAP where they can find their real “Safe Space” from bad news. There No One can offend them with reality! And for only $65K/year!

    Excellent plan! Just don’t send them to Trump University. It’s defunct. OH, and it was fradulent. In fact, our president elect may end up testifying in the civil case. Hope he’s not too busy not building that wall.

    Another positive to your plan is, if you send them to an actual accredited college, they will be too educated to ever vote for someone like Trump!

  11. If you wonder why you fellows have this thread to yourself, perhaps you’ve recognized that the vast majority of local residents long ago stopped reading baristanet comments where you guys talk to yourselves (or you and your multiple personnnas talk to yourself).

  12. Oh please, suck it up. She lost. The country didn’t want four more years of failed policies, and pandering. Let’s take the regulatory stranglehold off of our economy, and address some real issues facing the country, other than whether a man can use the ladies room. Watching everyone walking around yesterday looking like the world ended was not evocative of the kind of stamina that it takes to get this country back on course. To Mike91, I say grow a pair. There’s work to be done.
    Now the Clintons will have to find a new way to enrich themselves, given the expose of their “charity,” and nefarious schemes to undermine our national security. Good riddance.

  13. Deadeye, ol buddy, in regards to your comment to me: As our president elect mentioned during a national debate of actual presidential candidates, nothing to worry about for me! He’s also our first president to appear in pornography, on the same subject. SO MUCH TO BE PROUD OF YOU GUYS.

    And of the two candidates charitable foundations, which one is still allowed to collect donations in New York State? Give you two guesses.

    I’m curious to see what ‘regulatory strangleholds’ Republicans eliminate. I’m sure you won’t mourn Dodd-Frank. On a more looney tune note (which I think I will be saying a lot), one of Donald’s flunkies mentioned eliminating CAFE standards for autos. Surely, no harm in that!

  14. President Obama’s failed policies have driven our economy to the brink of disaster. Did you know that, for 80 consecutive months, this economy has added jobs?

    Sad!

    Unemployment has spiked to nearly 5%! And 20 million people have health insurance that they didn’t have 8 years ago. 20 million people going to doctors and hospitals who never did before, it’s tragic.

    Won’t someone think of all the soldiers who could have been productively employed in Iraq or Afghanistan, instead they’re back home, bored.

    Our country needs to go in a different direction, and Trump’s just the man to do it.

  15. Genius, jobs added a predominately service industry “fries with that?” or seasonal. ~95mm able bodied Americans aren’t in the labor force. Obama has been, by any standard, an abject failure. Sorry to insult any college educated fast food workers that can’t find a job that better matches their skill set and education in this abysmal economy.

  16. Also, price out that ACA insurance

    In about six months or so, about 12 million people will have to do just that, only there will be no more subsidies to help pay for it. Take that, poor people! *frowny face*

  17. mike 91 doesn’t want anybody sharing any “anti-PC nonsense about the real world.” This coming from a guy that is basically reading the bullet points from Donna Brazile’s memos with every reply he makes. It’ll be OK mikey, I promise. Daddy’s here son. Hold my hand.

  18. “In about six months or so, about 12 million people will have to do just that, only there will be no more subsidies to help pay for it. Take that, poor people! *frowny face*”

    When you say subsidies, do you mean my tax dollars? No, I don’t want my tax dollars supporting someone else, whether it’s for health insurance or food stamps (Oh, can I still say that or do I need to call it the SNAP program? Don’t want to offend anyone). As a white, working male in this country, I have never reaped the benefits of government. I paid (and still paying) my student loans. I did not receive financial aid to “subsidize” my education. I’ve never collected unemployment because I’ve worked hard my entire life. Should I find myself in a situation that I may need it, so be it. But I will always work, even if it’s at McDonalds.

    “I need to know, which set of policies will “put America first”? Because in addition to his loathsome personality that made the debates off limits to my politically curious children, there is plenty to wonder about what his supporters actually like about his policies, such as they are.”

    42% of his supporters say it will never get built, so 58% say it will? Let me ask you this, do you lock you doors and windows at night on your house? I do. People need to get over the whole immigration thing. It’s ILLEGAL immigration that bothers Americans. My great grandparents came over from Italy and stayed at Ellis Island before they were allowed to enter the mainland. The did not sneak in, there was a process that was followed and it was tough. They would do it all over again I’m sure. So yes, build a big a$$ wall that stops people from walking over, living and working here and sending their money back home.

    Trade war? Call it what you may, but when we have been at a trade deficit with Mexico for over 20 years. U.S. goods exports to Mexico in 2015 were $236 billion, down 1.6%. U.S. goods imports from Mexico totaled $295 billion in 2015, up 0.2%. $59 billion difference is YUGE! I agree that if a company wants to move operations outside the US, then they should be taxed higher. Why should only the people at the top reap the benefits of moving outside this country? The product becomes cheaper, the price stays the same, and the suits get richer and richer. Only benefit I see if for the guys high up, not the workers. You leave this country to manufacture products and then try to import them back in at the same price, we will tax you either back in or out of business.

    Ban Muslims? I say temporarily ban people who are potential terrorists that come from terrorist countries. Why is it so PC to NOT want to safeguard the American people? Until we can figure out a way to vet these people coming in, yes, temporarily ban them.

    Iran? Our great President and his SOS Kerry sold our soul to the devil with that deal. We provided them with the finance to build nuclear “energy” with the hope that the same people that chant “Death to America” will not make nuclear bombs one day. Because hey, if we didn’t provide them the finance, they were just going to do it anyway. Wait for it…..I know, the inspectors at the IAEA will make sure they are playing by the rules. And if they don’t?

    His policies?

    Pro-life
    National Security
    Immigration
    Economy

    Without going into all the specifics of each policy, I, obviously along with a majority of people feel the same way as he does. The problem with the left is you guys picked the wrong candidate to represent you. The American people saw how deceitful she is, how phony she is, how she takes money from the same corporations she claims she will hold accountable. She received a majority of the woman vote the same reason Barack received the black vote, simply because it would be a first.

    This younger generation of people with the “micro-aggression, safe space seeking, me first attitude” is getting old and the silent majority has spoken. Time to take you ball and leave the playground, the party is over…

  19. AustinMilbarge.

    Got it, eliminate all government handouts. For the love of God, I hope the republicans try that one. Speaking of which, if this is how republicans really feel, just quit with the pious crap already. It’s hypocritical. And you’ve never “reaped the benefits of government”? So you’ve never driven on roads? Went to public schools? Or are these benefits ok because they don’t just apply to poor people?

    The point about the wall is, it’s never getting built. It’s a fantasy and even a large minority of his own supporters don’t believe it will. It is one in a long line of many many many lies Trump had already told the American people. He has no realistic plan to build it. And everyone acknowledges the need for immigration reform. But again, deporting 11 million people is both unrealistic and cruel, especially to people who have known no other country.

    Iran was well on its way to building a nuclear weapon, sanctions or now. Now we have inspections. What happens if we no longer have a deal? Not even those. We haven’t had a war in the Middle East in a while, let’s try it again!

    The Muslim ban is equally idiotic. Terrorists will just recruit from countries not on the list but with sizeable Muslim populations. Are you going to ban business people coming from France? From Turkey? Bye bye airbases used by planes dropping bombs on Syria. Fantasy. And dumb.

    Starting grade wars with Mexico and China will do one thing: make everyone poorer and do nothing for trade deficits. The way to lower the trade deficit with is make Mexicans able to afford more of our crap. Donald still thinks China is manipulating their currency. He is dangerously misinformed.

    Oh and Hillary didn’t receive just the majority of the women’s vote, she received the majority of the vote. So, not so much on the silent majority thing. I

  20. I told my kids 1) that people knowingly decided to vote for a dog whistling bigot, 2) that the Democrats won the popular vote, and 3) our electoral system is broken

  21. The popular vote argument is flawed. Many red voters in blue states like NY, NJ, CT, Ma, Cal, don’t bother voting because their votes don’t count. Same goes for blue voters in red states. As long as there is an Electoral College we will never know what the popular would really be. The Electoral College is actually genius way of preventing too much concentration of power in a few geographical areas. Like it or not we do have to respect the middle of the country. When the coastal elites are sending there 18 year olds off to Wellesley and Yale with a tear in their eye the deplorables are sending their’s off to Camp Lejeune wondering if they will come back in one piece. A lot of good people out there….and they are not as dumb and racist as you think.

  22. *yawn* We can go back and forth all day about this. The fact of the matter is this: tell you kids the sun will still rise in the east and the earth won’t stop spinning. You may not like who is your President, but hey, a lot of us didn’t like who was our President the last eight years but you deal with it. I don’t recall rioting when Obama won both times. Does this say something about this generation now? It use to be you protested and rioted for Civil Riots and Human Rights. Now, they just riot because they lost? Sounds like a bunch of pansies to me. Put your big boy (or big girl) boots on and get back to work, make something of yourself and this awesome country of ours…

  23. First of all, who’s to say the generally peaceful protests aren’t about civil rights? We just elected the candidate endorsed by the KKK. Some may feel their civil rights are in danger. Do you blame them?

    Secondly, no ones protesting because we lost. This is the start of the opposition. We put up with similar, or do the tea party protests escape you? Get used to it.

  24. “Sounds like a bunch of pansies to me”
    —interesting choice of words—sad to see that political correctness is still keeping you from using the euphemism you really want to use. so go ahead—say what you really want to say. you’re using an anonymous handle. what are you afraid of?

    “make something of yourself and this awesome country of ours”
    —i thought this country was a “disaster”—i mean, isn’t that an oft repeated line in Mr. Trump’s stump speech? the exhausting leaps in “thinking” when you have to follow Mr. Trump’s random synapse firings is gonna wear on you soon…

    the good news, mr. milblaaargh, is that it no one is listening to your advice—but you knew that, didn’t you?

  25. An endorsement by the KKK brings no legitimacy to Trump, the say way the endorsement by the Black Panther Party brought no legitimacy to Obama. To say that the protest’s are about civil rights is hysterical, he hasn’t even taken office yet, made no policy yet and people are protesting about what he may do? Please, they are upset they didn’t get Hillary elected. They lost, move on. As far as the Tea Party, I have no compassion for them nor do I agree with them, so thats moot.

    As far as the PC thing, yup, if I use my choice of words on this site they would be censored or my post taken down because I may offend someone. Apparently the left wants everyone else to be tolerant of their views, but the moment you disagree, you are a racist, sexist (insert any “phobe” here).

    Yes, this country is in a bad place. It’s still awesome, but in a bad place. No one is listening to me is all right by me. Apparently they are not listening to you either, now run to your safe space and deal with the micro-aggressions from the right. Or better yet, call out of work sick today so you can deal with the reality of the next four years. *DEUCES*

  26. “If I use my choice of words on this site they would be censored or my post taken down because I may offend someone. Apparently the left wants everyone else to be tolerant of their views, but the moment you disagree, you are a racist, sexist (insert any “phobe” here).”

    —so you want to use certain words, but don’t because you don’t want to be labeled “phobic”. Um, it’s precisely your desire to label and slur that makes you phobic. The mind boggles…

  27. You know, this “safe space” thing is not the clever insult you think it is. I am only vaguely aware of what you’re talking about, and am not as young as you seem to think I am.

    As far as the PC thing, yup, if I use my choice of words on this site they would be censored or my post taken down because I may offend someone. Apparently the left wants everyone else to be tolerant of their views, but the moment you disagree, you are a racist, sexist (insert any “phobe” here).

    “I’m afraid of being called a sexist if I use a sexist word!” Hilarious. If nothing else, you’re doing a good (if unintended job) explaining the last few days.

    Oh, and by the way. Day two!

  28. By the way, Mr. Milblaaargh, according to his Twitter feed, today Mr Trump is accepting of the protesters!

    Do you: a.) Revise your stated POV to fully echo your candidate. b. ) Hold the course, knowing that he’s a synapse fire away from reversing himself. c.) Modify to a mixed, contradictory position, like your recent “still awesome but in a bad place” formulation that made me laugh out loud at its tortured rhetorical gymnastics?

    I’m only pressing here to try and get you in shape for 4 years of this exhausting routine…

  29. Calling another man, and I use that term loosely, a pu$$y, and being called a sexist is fascinating. Is that like being called a racist if I only voted for Obama because I am black, or sexist if I voted for Hillary only because she’s a woman? So glad to see you included a link to the NY Times, anything new on CNN?

    I don’t revise my stand about the protestors, they are protesting because they didn’t like the outcome. They don’t respect the process. This ME ME ME generation is clueless and lazy. While they are out protesting, the rest of us are working. There is a reason democratic states didn’t vote for her, why? And yes, America is still awesome but in a bad place, heading in the wrong direction, etc., etc., etc.

    Lets flip the script here, what would you tell your children if Hillary won?

  30. To clarify for Mr. Mlblaaaargh—I don think calling protesters “pansies” makes you “sexist”.

    We both know what word you really wanted to use instead of “pansies”. We both know what the use of that word makes you.

    Again, I don’t understand your cowardice. You’re afraid of being banned here? Then just make up another fake screen name. Reminder—you are the only one who knows who you are behind your screen name!

    But we’d all be better off if you stopped faking it and just spoke freely, like you really want to. You’d feel so liberated and everyone else will clearly see what you are really about.

  31. No need to hide behind my screen name. Anytime you want to meet over a hot cup of Joe, let me know. I’d be more than happy to have a fireside chat about politics in person. Or does jcunningham, whomever he or she may be, only exist in this realm?

    To clarify for “jcunningham”, I am in shape for the next 4 years, I’ve had 8 years to think about it. You?

  32. I explained to our kids that 4 years will go by quickly, apathy is dangerous, and that they should never give up on the democratic process.
    They also know that only about 28% of registered voters actually voted for Trump, and only about 27% voted for Hilary.
    A full 42% or so stayed home, and 4% or so voted for third party candidates or write ins.
    Therefore, as I explained to them, apathy allows a mere 27% of voters to imagine they are the triumphant victors, and to then claim a mandate over the other 73%.

  33. “I’d be more than happy to have a fireside chat . . . ”

    The irony of that statement is compelling. You know what I’m getting at, eh Milbarg?

  34. Calling another man, and I use that term loosely, a pu$$y, and being called a sexist is fascinating. Is that like being called a racist if I only voted for Obama because I am black, or sexist if I voted for Hillary only because she’s a woman? So glad to see you included a link to the NY Times, anything new on CNN?

    No, you’re a fool because you want to say or do whatever you want and blame others for the consequence, however minor they are.

    Last question: Because its in the NY Times, you think he’s not using lobbyists for his transition, after saying he wouldn’t be beholden to lobbyists? Should be easy to fact check whether a lobbyist for Verizon is working on transitioning the FCC (by the way, hope you like paying more for bandwidth after the FCC reclassifies the internet).

    This is day 2! I thought he’d wait at least a week before he started doing the opposite of what he said. Oh, this is going to be fun.

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