MontClairVoyant: Can’t See the Forest (Street) for the Crowding. And Election Day Nears

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DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Developer Steven Plofker wants to create a take-out restaurant with some seating in a RESIDENTIAL section of Forest Street. Haven’t Forest residents suffered enough traffic and parking problems?

Sincerely,
I.M. Appalled

At least the Zoning Board of Adjustment, at its October 24 meeting, postponed further discussion of the site’s future until December. Unfortunately, that’s December 2018, not December 5018.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
If Plofker wants Montclair’s 1,417,838th eatery to be in a RESIDENTIAL section, why doesn’t he try to open a restaurant on his own front lawn?

Sincerely,
Practice What You Breach

Developers don’t want to live near the congestion they create or worsen, you silly person. And where did that figure of 1,417,838 eateries come from? I thought that was the number of variances our town granted developers this year.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Then, at the Historic Preservation Commission’s October 25 meeting, Plofker acted snippy when everything didn’t go his way. For instance, despite his huge family wealth, he balked at the relatively modest cost of removing brick infill at a Claremont Avenue office building!

Sincerely,
Blowing a Bugle for Frugal

Why don’t developers just rule Montclair and cut out “the middleman” (boards, commissions, Township Council)? Trump could then send troops to block Glen Ridge’s historic preservation/non-overbuilding philosophy from crossing our burg’s eastern border.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
As trains cross into and out of Montclair each day, what do you think of the frequent delays, disruptions, and other problems on the Montclair-Boonton Line?

Sincerely,
Feeling Railroaded

I’ll be sending New Jersey Transit a holiday card via the 8:17 from Walnut. Expect it to arrive at 8:59 — in December 5018.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Many people take the train, but our school district just decided to “take the fifth”…

Sincerely,
Amend Meant

Montclair High staircase out of circulation. Awful. Now, getting above the first floor requires a trip to Stilts R Us.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Meanwhile, the sample Election Day ballot I received for November 6 says my polling place is Mount Hebron, but that middle school has been Buzz Aldrin for a while. What is Essex County trying to say?

Sincerely,
Not So, Joe

Maybe it’s a plea to solemnly respect history, so I’m writing in ’60s cartoon character Deputy Dawg for county executive.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Who will actually get your vote for the U.S. Senate, the House, etc.?

Sincerely,
Secret Ballot-Challenged

A vote for any GOP candidate is in effect a vote for Trump, because almost no prominent Republicans have denounced the Oval Office occupant for his atrocious words and actions. Yet those politicians can still somehow stand erect despite lacking spines.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Do you mean atrocious words and actions such as Trump’s encouragement of violence against prominent Democrats (inspiring those pipe-bomb threats) and his continuing support of easy gun access after yet another horrific massacre (at that Pittsburgh synagogue)?

Sincerely,
Career of Evil

Yes. If only Applegate Farm could send Trump the ice-cream flavors “Decency Swirl” and “Compassion Crunch.”

Dave Astor, author, is the MontClairVoyant. His opinions about politics and local events are strictly his own and do not represent or reflect the views of Baristanet.

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4 COMMENTS

  1. Dave…you are like a broken record. We get it, your TDS and distaste for development is all consuming. Getting boring…actually it has been boring for quite some time.
    As for Plofker…you have to admit his projects are well done. (the Marlboro Inn is ancient history) I assume he pays a lot in taxes so if he does well, good for him and good for us. Cheer up…

  2. Thank you for the comment, flipside.

    Well, not a total broken record ( 🙂 ) — I hadn’t talked about the Montclair-Boonton Line for a while, and also hadn’t talked much about the upcoming Election Day specifically. As for development, there’s always a new wrinkle — such as the not-mentioned-before-by-me Forest Street take-out-place proposal. So, if there’s new development news, I’ll often discuss it.

    Plofker’s projects do seem higher quality than Pinnacle’s, but many of them are just too dense for the space they occupy. I have no idea if he pays his fair share of taxes or not — hopefully, yes!

    TDS (Trump Derangement Syndrome)? My feeling is that continuing to support Trump after the endless lies, the “caravan” fear-mongering, the violence he indirectly inspires, etc., etc., is much more of a syndrome than opposing him.

  3. “Good Lord, why did I click on this?” — ha! Well, I’m glad you did, justbob. I’ll try to write a better column next time. 🙂

    And, yes, MANY rich people pay less taxes than they should (Trump and Jared Kushner are major examples). Meaning less money for social services, infrastructure, etc. Hope they’re all proud.

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