MontClairVoyant: Teacher Vaccinations and Luxury Rental Escalations

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Starting March 15, New Jersey will FINALLY expand COVID vaccine eligibility to teachers and school staff — which could have a big impact on ending all-remote instruction in Montclair. Why was NJ later than many other states with this?

Sincerely,
The Snail Prerogative

Because Jersey is “special (special), so special (special),” to quote a Pretenders song. In this case, special at not being special.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
That said, better late than never — and Montclair schools might now reopen sooner in at least hybrid mode, right?

Sincerely,
The Prius Prerogative

Fingers crossed that there’ll be enough vaccine doses to meet the demand. Ideally, first COVID shots for teachers and school staff in March, second shots in April, schools partly reopen sometime in May, and June Lockhart.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
June Lockhart of “Lassie” and “Lost in Space”?

Sincerely,
Danger, Will Robinson!

Too bad they didn’t combine those two TV shows and have Lassie bring home the lost spaceship in her mouth for depositing on the lawn of Buzz Aldrin’s former Princeton Place house. “Good dog, Lassie. GOOD dog!”

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
NOT good is the scheduled spring opening of Two South Willow (part of the so-called “arts district”) and its 200 “luxury rental residences.” With affordable housing such a problem in Montclair, why the hell do we need ANY new luxury units?

Sincerely,
No Kibosh on Posh

We don’t need them; this is more profit maximizing by developers enabled by many appointed and elected Montclair officials. They’re all hoping for plaques in The Gentrification Hall of Fame, which explains why they don’t buy anti-plaque toothpaste.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
What would Montclair’s “luxury” developers say during their Hall of Fame induction speeches?

Sincerely,
William Wordsnetworth

“$$$$? $$$$! $$$$…$$$$…$$$$!! $,$,$,$!!! $-$-$-$!!!!”

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
There wouldn’t be a dry eye in the house. “Cry-y-y-ing…”

Sincerely,
I Don’t Second That Emotion

Tissue sales would far outpace anti-plaque toothpaste sales in Montclair stores. Heck, hearing speeches like that would be like reading a poignant novel — minus the poignancy and the novel.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Getting back to school-district matters, a petition has been launched for a referendum to make Montclair’s Board of Education elected. Why are we one of only 11 towns, out of 565 in New Jersey, with an appointed BOE?

Sincerely,
It’s a Small World

Montclair is “special (special), so — ”

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Shush! No repeating yourself! So, do you prefer an elected BOE or one that continues to be appointed by the mayor?

Sincerely,
Quiz, Not Quiznos

I prefer elected — even knowing the danger that some rich people might give lots of money to candidates who oppose teacher unions and favor standardized-test overkill and charter schools. Including millionaires, billionaires, and dillionaires (think artisanal pickles).

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Another new petition questions our school district’s use of the GoGuardian online tool that has been called spyware for monitoring students. What do you think?

Sincerely
Snoopy, But Not the Dog

I’m worried about invasion of privacy, and I mistrust a company trying to make a profit off of our children without their consent. Also, GoGuardian’s initials remind me of the novel “Gigi”; many of Colette’s other books were much better.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Including “Claudine at School,” the 1900 novel that should be rereleased as “Claudine at Remote School.” Speaking of COVID times, enough town employees have tested positive that collection of recycles has been temporarily halted. Thoughts?

Sincerely,
Keep On (Not) Truckin’

My sympathies to that diligent workforce. I do wonder if there could be just one garbage pickup a week in order to resume a recycling pickup — an idea not inspired by listening to “A Whiter Shade of Pail,” because many pails are blue.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
It’s “A Whiter Shade of PALE,” you idiot. In other news, various local groups and individuals have called for Montclair’s rent freeze to continue while the pandemic continues. Good idea?

Sincerely,
Cold Open

Yes. I’d even put rent checks in the freezer if I didn’t pay online.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Meanwhile, I heard that a Superior Court judge’s troubling Montclair-rent-control reversal was a public-comment topic during the Township Council’s virtual meeting March 2. Anything you want to add?

Sincerely,
Flip-Flop Mic Drop

In last week’s column, I sharply criticized that judge’s decision and the litigation-minded Montclair Property Owners Association. The bouquet the judge tossed the MPOA can be re-gifted during the busy wedding month of June.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Lockhart?

Sincerely,
Lassie Come Homewood

It’s unlikely the 1925-born actress will marry again at 95, and a busy highway like 95 is no place for a wedding.

 

 

Dave Astor, author, is the MontClairVoyant. His opinions about politics and local events are strictly his own and do not represent or reflect the views of Baristanet.

 

 

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2 COMMENTS

  1. Why are we one of only 11 towns, out of 565 in New Jersey, with an appointed BOE?

    A better question in considering changing education in Montclair is how many school boards does it take to educate children? Does the staggering count of 565 school boards even register with parents? Oh, right. We’re Montclair. We don’t do math well. Let me put it to the parents in an easy to understand way. In New Jersey, we have a school board for the equivalent number of students at Montclair High School. Stupid us, we just have a Principal over the high school. We need to staff up management! More chiefs! Maybe we should stop living our parent’s lives. Free-thinkers unite!

  2. Thank you for the comment, Frank. I hear you about the staggering number of BOEs in NJ, but unless more towns merged and/or shared services that’s the way it’s going to be. I would want a BOE to be just focused on Montclair (whether that BOE is doing a good job or not is of course another question). As for staffing up on management, that can be limited within a specific town.

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