MontClairVoyant: Yes, I Also Discussed the Bellevue Last Week, So This Is A Double Feature

BY  |  Thursday, Nov 23, 2017 1:30pm  |  COMMENTS (0)

MontClairVoyant

 

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
One alleged reason for the Bellevue Theatre’s dismaying shutdown is that it wasn’t getting enough business. If true, and I’m not sure it is, why didn’t the beloved movie house publicize this months ago?

Sincerely,
Sending Out an SOS (Not)

Montclair’s community-minded residents would have responded by going to the Bellevue in droves, creating lines stretching to the North Pole — with those lines doubling as a better-than-breadcrumbs trail south for Santa. Continue Reading

Baristanet Thanksgiving Round Up 2017

BY  |  Wednesday, Nov 22, 2017 12:15pm  |  COMMENTS (0)

 

 

thanksgiving

The big day is almost here — Thanksgiving, Turkey Day, Gobble ’till you Wobble Day!

Here is a collection of recipes, cocktails, decor advice, playlists and more that we have given you over the years to help you host a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner:

Continue Reading

MontClairVoyant: After the Bellevue Theatre Closes, Montclairites Feel Lousy and Townhouse-y

BY  |  Thursday, Nov 16, 2017 10:30am  |  COMMENTS (0)

 

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Can you devote two-thirds of this column to the shocking news of the Bellevue Theatre closing, and the other third to developer Steven Plofker’s dismal plan to cram a pair of huge, pricey, two-unit townhouses into a tiny tract of church land near the library?

Sincerely,
Dee Pressed

Can’t say it’ll be an exact 66-to-33-percent split. Even if it was, there’s still the 1 percent to worry about. And I do worry about the 1 percent…whose members usually pick profit over community when shutting down or constructing things.

 

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
The appeal of the Bellevue cinema?

Sincerely,
Twin Peaks

It was in a beautiful, charming, 95-year-old Tudor building many Montclairites could walk to. Of course, Montclairites can also walk from our New Jersey town to see a film in California, but they might miss the previews.

 

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Your experiences with the Bellevue? Continue Reading

Montclair Film ’70s MIXTAPE: A 1970s Dance Party Fundraiser with Stephen Colbert

Tuesday, Nov 14, 2017 12:01pm  |  COMMENTS (0)

Montclair Film today announced ‘70s MIXTAPE: A 1970s DANCE PARTY featuring live music from Joe McGinty & the Loser’s Lounge, New York City’s premier interpreters of modern song, with special performances from Stephen Colbert, Patrick Wilson, Warren Zanes, and other special guests. Performances will range from disco to pop, funk to new wave, celebrating styles that ruled the dancefloors of the 1970s. The event will be designed around the colors of black, white and gold, to capture the spirit of the era.

The event takes place on Saturday, February 24, 2018, at 8:00 PM at The Wellmont Theater in Montclair, NJ. Proceeds from this special evening will support Montclair Film’s ongoing, year-round film and education programs. Continue Reading

Final Rocky Horror Picture Show Tonight at The Bellevue for Home of Happiness

Saturday, Nov 11, 2017 10:50am  |  COMMENTS (0)

It’s the swan song tonight for Home of Happiness as they give their final performance at The Bellevue of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. The show has called the Bellevue home since moving from The Screening Zone in 2003.

After tonight’s bittersweet performance, Home of Happiness will have to pack everything up into a moving truck. Their next stop is the Caldwell Theatre, opening night date still pending.

Cast member Larry Viezel writes…

We are very saddened by the sudden closure of the theatre. We’ve put blood, sweat and tears into that place. Not to mention a whole bunch of glitter. We built the stage in theatre 4. We added doors on stage right between the theatres 3 and 4, both in front of and behind the screen. We had a huge amount of storage for all of our props for not just our regular shows but for all of our various theme shows as well. We had a dressing room at the top of the small landing of stairs. I’ve seen Rocky Horror all over the world and I have never really seen a movie theatre more perfectly suited to do the show.

In the mean time, if you want to book The Rocky Horror Picture Show for a private event, click for info.

MontClairVoyant: A Murphy Bed in the Governor’s Mansion and Other Election Reflections

BY  |  Thursday, Nov 09, 2017 1:00pm  |  COMMENTS (0)

 


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

What would you call Phil Murphy, Chris Christie, and Jon Corzine — the last three people elected governor of New Jersey?

Sincerely,
Garden State Razzer

A Goldman Sachs sandwich.


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Yup, Murphy and Corzine were top execs at GS (aka Greedy Soulless), and Christie was in office between them. Now the question becomes: With Murphy elected Nov. 7 thanks to many Montclairites and other voters, will that Democratic multimillionaire match his campaign rhetoric by governing in a relatively progressive way?

Sincerely,
Corporation Nation

Murphy will at least be much better than the awful Christie, whose post-“Bridgegate” popularity sank even lower than Satan’s because traffic on the Highway to Hell never got stopped.

Continue Reading

MontClairVoyant: All You Need Is Guv? A Comedic Preview of New Jersey’s Election

BY  |  Thursday, Nov 02, 2017 5:31pm  |  COMMENTS (49)


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

With Election Day coming this Tuesday, Nov. 7, can you discuss who and what you think will be best for New Jersey and Montclair?

Sincerely,
Funny to See the Word “Candid” in “Candidate”

Yes, but first I’d like to say that I’ll be voting at Buzz Aldrin, not for Buzz Aldrin. Buzz Aldrin (the middle school, not the Montclair-raised astronaut) used to be Mount Hebron. I also didn’t vote for Mount Hebron — though I did vote for his wife, Mindy Hebron.


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Will you please SHUT UP? Now, about the election…

Sincerely,
Rising Snide Lifts All Votes

Republican Lt. Gov. Kim Guadagno supported the vile Gov. Christie and then moved even further rightward during her current gubernatorial campaign with such things as foul anti-immigration words so contrary to Montclair’s diverse values. I’ll never vote for her, unless she runs with Trump on the “Send Us to Mars On a One-Way-Ticket Ticket.”


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

You mentioned two tickets!

Sincerely,
Mr. Obvious

Want ’em? Good seats. Face value. For “Hamilton.” Not the smash musical, but the play about the New Jersey town near Trenton. Thrill to the choreography of car-costumed dancers hoofing it on Kuser Road.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

What about Phil Murphy for governor?

Sincerely,
Also Known As “Impoverished Phil” Continue Reading

Montclair Bikery Presents 5th Annual Turkey Ride to Benefit Human Needs Food Pantry, Nov. 19

BY  |  Tuesday, Oct 31, 2017 10:15am  |  COMMENTS (0)

Following up on its huge success the last 4 years, the Montclair Bikery’s 5th Annual Turkey Ride to collect turkeys for the Human Needs Food Pantry will take place on Sunday, Nov. 19, 2017. Cyclists will meet at the Montclair Bikery at 145 Valley Road at 9:00 a.m. and ride a flat, 15-mile circuitous route to the Brookdale Shoprite on Broad Street, Bloomfield, where they will buy frozen turkeys, and deliver them (by bike) to the Human Needs Food Pantry in Montclair. The Human Needs Food Pantry will be distributing over 1000 turkeys and all the fixings for a Thanksgiving feast to their clients the week of Nov. 20.

Last year, over 200 cyclists rode through chilly temperatures and bought and donated 285 turkeys to the Human Needs Food Pantry, along with $11,000 in donations, which was then matched by Partners For Health, resulting in a $22,000 donation to the Pantry. This year, the Montclair Bikery is hoping to have 300 cyclists and collect 400 turkeys for our neighbors in need. Mike Bruno, the Executive Director of the Human Needs Food Pantry states “We are grateful to the Montclair Bikery and all those who organize and participate in the annual Turkey Ride. Last year our pantry gave out 1000 turkeys to people in need in Montclair, Bloomfield and throughout Essex County. This year, we expect the need to be even greater as our numbers continue to increase. We thank each and every one of the charitable people who make this happen; the turkey ride truly exemplifies the spirit of “giving thanks” for all we have by sharing with others who are less fortunate”.

“I would have never imagined when we did the first Montclair Bikery Turkey ride four years ago that it would have grown so big. Every year we see more and more people embrace this great cause. It’s a fun way to give back to our community and I’m proud that the Montclair Bikery is a motivating force” says Dave Adornato, Owner/Montclair Bikery. Continue Reading

Aging Is In! AIM’s Celebrating Aging in Film Is A Hit

Friday, Oct 27, 2017 1:05pm  |  COMMENTS (0)

Aging in Montclair (AIM) recently collaborated with bevival.com to present their first “Celebrating Aging in Film Series” last weekend. Three films were shown in the Presentation Hall of Montclair State University’s new School of Communications and Media, and the final film at Montclair Art Museum.

The goal of the series was to educate, entertain, and inspire intergenerational audiences about the issues of aging, and to promote an ongoing dialogue on this important topic. The four selections, “Up,” “Cherry Blossoms,” “Iris” and “The World’s Fastest Indian,” dealt seriously and imaginatively with aging issues such as dementia, romance, and sex, and portrayed a variety of later life experiences including the end of life.

Mario Garrett, PhD., Professor of Gerontology at UC San Diego curated this event, presenting thought-provoking questions in his introduction to each film and led an engaging discussion following each screening. AIM hoped to attract an intergenerational audience of film lovers, and they came –students, younger adults, those approaching retirement age, caregivers, and vibrant older adults experiencing the aging themes of the movies.

The consensus of those who attended was that the best part of each screening was the lively post-film discussion, as Professor Garrett encouraged the audience to explore issues of aging and stereotypes of “ageism” as they were portrayed in the films. Continue Reading

MontClairVoyant: As Halloween Nears, Montclair Is Both a Funhouse and House of Horrors

BY  |  Thursday, Oct 26, 2017 1:00pm  |  COMMENTS (0)

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
In honor of Halloween next Tuesday, I’d like this column to depict Montclair as both a funhouse and house of horrors. Are you up for it?

Sincerely,
Eerie on Erie

No, I Iive in a first-floor apartment. But, sure, bring it on — just give me a minute to don my humor-columnist costume. Clown nose? Check. Dunce cap? Check. Glasses with fake eyes popping out? Check. Check? Monthly.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
On Halloween, I’ll be driving downhill into Montclair on Bloomfield Avenue to see all the oversized buildings that have recently risen or are coming soon. Do I have anything to worry about?

Sincerely,
Gaslighted on Gates

Be careful of violating noise ordinances when you let out a series of agonized screams.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
I’m a downtown Montclairite who, months before Halloween, developed ringing in my ears from countless drivers letting out a series of agonized screams. Should I sue the developers?

Sincerely,
Panicked on Park

You could try, but they have deep pockets. One developer might offer recompense by luring you to The MC hotel’s future rooftop bar with a 10-cents-off coupon for a drink…of tap water. Continue Reading

Featured Comment

Sad. Let's hope that this is not its "Last Tango." One of the most beautiful and iconic buildings in town. Valentino, Garbo, Keaton must have played there.

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