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MontClairVoyant: When Spring Break’s Not Newsy, Quips Can Luxuriate in a Jacuzzi
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
There have been many historic events since Montclair last had a permanent schools superintendent in 2015 -- a LONG three years ago. Can you name one event?
Sincerely,
Time Aprils On
Trump became Liar-in-Chief, Racist-in-Chief, Sexist-in-Chief,...
MontClairVoyant: Montclairites Protest Guns. Endless Superintendent Search Stuns
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
I'm awed that millions of people, including many Montclair students and adults, protested America's gun scourge on March 24. And I'm disgusted by right-wing pols and NRA execs who act like it's...
MontClairVoyant: Historical Fiction About a Library That Stocks Historical Fiction
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Before discussing the school-budget news from March 19's Board of Education meeting, can you write a part-factual/part-comedic history of Montclair's stellar library as its 125th-birthday gala nears on April 14?
Sincerely,...
MontClairVoyant: Young Generation Generates More Leadership Than Many Adults Do
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Any thoughts on yesterday's 17-minute student walkout for better gun control?
Sincerely,
Go Away, NRA
Wonderful that a huge number of Montclair students took part in that March 14 national protest, and showed leadership...
MontClairVoyant: When Visited After Dark, Montclair Schools Lose Some Spark
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Last week, you said downtown Montclair is getting so overdeveloped that the building-height-limit horse left the barn and opened the trendy restaurant Hay & Oats. Is that eatery farm-to-table?
Sincerely,
Remember the Mane!
No,...
MontClairVoyant: Superintendent-Themed Column Is Supersized With Other Topics
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Before you discuss the Feb. 26 superintendent-finalists forum and a possible new Bellevue Theatre, what about the never-ending gun massacres that moved students to plan March 14 walkouts in Montclair and...
MontClairVoyant: The Directions on This Column’s GPS – Guns, Politicians, Superintendents
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
After America's latest horrific/preventable/infuriating gun massacre on Valentine's Day, NRA-bought Republicans again said little more than "thoughts and prayers." Before those spineless right-wingers hopefully get voted out, how should they be...
MontClairVoyant: Superintendent Search: Hoping for Three Candid Candidates
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Your Montclair-themed Gettysburg Address parody last week was so sophomoric it barely got 35 likes -- and I suspect some were from Russian trolls and Elvis impersonators. What say you?
Sincerely,...
MontClairVoyant: Lincoln and Super Bowl – Four Scores and Seven Points Ago
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
"Four score and seven years ago..."
Sincerely,
Cal N. Der
Hillside School opened, in 1931. Lincoln's birthday is Feb. 12, so I'm about to write a column mixing the Gettysburg Address with Montclair...
MontClairVoyant: Column Milestone Before Frelinghuysen Stops Being a Millstone
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
I know you have an anniversary to mention, but could you first react to Jan. 29's news that Upper Montclair's congressman Rodney Frelinghuysen will not run for reelection this year. Happy?
Sincerely,...
MontClairVoyant: All the ‘Fake News’ That’s Fit to Print (or Post Online)
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
I'm upset that centrist congressional Democrats spinelessly agreed to end the federal government shutdown Jan. 22 without striking a better deal with Republicans. Entertain me!
Sincerely,
Capitulation Exasperation
I'll do that with some...
MontClairVoyant: Will the ‘Montclair Republicans’ Organization Ever Denounce Trump?
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
I see nothing on the "Montclair Republicans" website denouncing Trump for calling majority-black nations "shithole countries" on Jan. 11, for signing tax "reform" last month that hurts our town, for bragging...
MontClairVoyant: Russian Novels Are Greater Than the Latest Lackawanna Plaza Plan
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Now that the latest latest Lackawanna Plaza plan is thankfully smaller, should that historic railroad station-turned commercial complex be renamed?
Sincerely,
Bloomfield of Dreams
Call it "Lack Anna Plaza," because Anna Karenina didn't throw...
MontClairVoyant: Montclair Cat Has Nine Lives to Live and One Column to Write
DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,
Hi! I'm your new cat. You've never missed a column since it started in 2003 in a newspaper that shall remain nameless but rhymes with Tontclair Mimes, so you need a...